Thursday, May 4, 2017

Feeling like a Rock Star until Not

I felt like a rock star after completing the AZTR 750 race. The week after I finished I was so tired......similar to the Colorado Trail Race fatigue.

Than the wife got sick and I got body was in the deficient, I'm pretty resilient.  Until I'm not. WTF. So, I got sick, went to the doctor the other day and I'm antibiotics. I'm racing a 108 miler ss gravel race on Saturday. The pressure is on to do well. I like the pressure but than again I do not. I'm called El Freako for a reason.....revel in the chaos. Fuck. I want to win so bad at times it hurts.......the stress is worrisome.

After finishing the AZTR 750 and only being 6 hours from first it makes me wonder. I trained so hard for that and I know I beat the ss record by half a day. I yearn for more. I'm an addict. There is always more. My mind turns and turns. It's a crazy existence. I'm so fucked at times. I'm so restless. I'll be 51 soon and I feel like I'm 20. I'm a madman.

Soon I'll be running my first 100 miler trail running race: Bryce Canyon in June. After completing the AZTR 750 race it seems so minuscule. No fucks given. NFG! I may change that mindset. It's so surreal what we can do as humans.

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